It's that ugly word that no one likes to hear.
It's a word that has been used a lot in my house lately.
The story of why is not important but the story of how is.
How did we get here? Almost 3 years together and not married even 6 months? How in the world did we get here?
I know my part.
Not asking for help when I am overwhelmed. Snapping at Josh if he doesn't do something how I would have done it. Not appreciating the things he does do rather than point out everything he doesn't. Looking at his faults and failures and not the things he has done.
Ick. I make myself sick looking at all of that. How can I expect things to work when I am being Bossy McBossy Pants?
I need to take a step back from my relationships that are thriving and think about what I am doing to grow those. I can tell you that I am destroying the one I have with Josh. It's awful, terrible and needs to stop.
That's what I am doing this coming year. I don't have a goal, a resolution an idea. I am making a commitment to DOING this. Action speaks louder than words and now is the time. I feel like I can only come up with bad experiences and times I have had with Josh when I know there are LOTS of good. So this year I am starting it by making a "Goodness Jar". Every time there is an accomplishment or highpoint of this year we will write it down and put it in that jar. Every time I think this is the "last straw" I'll take a look at that jar and realize there is lots of reasons that my anger needs to take a backseat because getting a divorce over Josh putting a non matching pair of socks on Dexter is just plain stupid. And yes. I have lost my mind about this before.
What are you doing to build and strengthen your relationships this year?